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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Notes from the field: oodles and oodles of oodles

So, we've decided that the furry bastards that we keep as pets, were they Dr. Seuss creatures, would be called in the common parlance "oodles". Given that, here are some facts about the oodle:

+Found only in the northern wastes of Udlmark, the wild oodle (known in the Latin as Felis taxideinae) is caged and domesticated by rural farmers for the purpose of bed-warming.

+The oodle comes in two varieties: the common oodle, a short-haired beast, and the hirsute oodle, which boasts a thick, luxurious coat. Both types generally display shades of brown, tawny, black, and grey.

(both common and hirsute oodles photographed here)

+The ability to keep and breed hirsute oodles is considered a status signifier, since this variety demands vast quantities of food to replenish its hefty coat and is an expensive animal to maintain. Attendant to this, the hirsute oodle is also given to producing loud, prolonged cries if not fed according to its whimsical schedule. Despite these factors, the hirsute oodle is in high demand due to its bed-warming capabilities.

+The common oodle has but one idiosyncrasy: it lusts after the fabric typically termed "chenille" and will chew and knead any object, be it pillow or blanket, of this material until the object disintegrates.

+Oodles may occasionally display the vulgar habit of suckling one another's bellies; this occurs most often in the male oodle.

1 comment:

Tampa BookWorm said...

Oh my goodness! This is priceless! Love the pics though.. they are adorable.

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